I Can Still Improve

Just when I thought I possess the knack for writing, I realize mine is elementary!

Being insomniac has its ups and downs. The good part is it gave me opportunity to browse. And browsing was indeed eye-opening.

I reckoned the world evolved around me and everything that mattered to me. Not that I am being self-centered, but hey, this blog is mine after all. But after browsing in the world wide web, I realized that, aside from my friends' experiences, there are other bloggers I can be acquainted with. They contain wonderful ideas that never inhabited my limited thinking. Ideas entirely different from my own and are worth learning from.

Like what I'm doing now. I am trying to twist my brain into producing well-versed thoughts. I am not misanthropic. I am a people person. But when I am in my solitude, I want the other part of me to take charge. I want my contemplative part to do the writing.

It is healthy to be in touch with the narrative, pensive self. And I needed to be inspired to rekindle this genre in me, if that's even what it is.

I hope I'm making sense. ^^

Iphone 4 Bandwagon: Should I Hitch a Ride?

April 2010, Silicon Valley: News about the existence of Iphone 4 leaked out after Apple's software engineer accidentally 'misplaced' the prototype in a bar. It revealed upgrades of the Iphone 3: video on high-definition, video-calling made possible with its front camera, better picture quality with its 5 mega-pixel camera. I was thrilled.

June 2010, US: People camped out all night just to be one of those chosen few who could get hold of the Iphone 4 first. Despite the information leakage, which was thought to discourage sales numbers, Iphone 4 hit three million of units sold in three weeks, and counting. And counting. It is becoming a phenomenon. I thought it was crazy.

Blackberry, the preferred phone of the corporate world, is beginning to decline its marketability. It is being replaced by Iphone. Bankers in London started it. It has been predicted that only a matter of time before all other businesses follow suit. Iphone 4 is gradually becoming a necessity, at least in the business world.

However, despite it being Apple's smartest phone so far, a glitch in the system arose. They said if the device is held wrongly, it disrupts reception. The signal bar decreases, which Steve Jobs explained as a usual fact across all wireless devices. Some other devices have worse flaws, theirs is rectifiable. The company addressed it by giving away free casing. The masses bought the resolution, continued purchasing the product, making Steve Jobs and its company, Apple, topple Microsoft as the giant in the technology industry.

August 2010, US: Today, Apple executive in charge of engineering, Mark Papermaster, resigned over complaints of poor reception. Hmm.. Just when I thought everything was under control. What's wrong with this picture?

And the most important question is, should I buy it?

August 2010, SG: My tech life is complete. I have my wonderful laptop, my pink Ipod, my faithful phone, and my fantastic DSLR camera. But when news spread about Iphone 4, it almost made me want to have one. The package is beautiful, with it I can be online 24/7, downloadable games are possible through Itunes. Iphone 4 is a status symbol. Should I take a ride on the bandwagon, then?

Hmm.. If connecting with my family overseas and the rest of the world will make Steve Jobs richer than he is now, if it means having to shell out some sweat and blood, hard-earned money and be committed for two years because of the plan, if it means having to be online more and personal interaction lesser, to be able to play more games and read lesser books, lesser humdrum moments and lesser contemplations... Hmm. I am having qualms.

We'll see.

Sr

The hardest part of hello is saying goodbye. Especially when you are bidding farewell to every single one you love.

Last year she was okay. A few months ago, we were informed that her ailment had recurred. She needed to undergo the same series of nightmarish treatments. Yesterday, she requested to be transferred to a hospice. The journey is finishing.

We planned to visit her on Saturday upon knowing how grave the situation is. But I guess time is what she's running out of. Among all the things she's running out of, time has the heaviest weight. And every tick of the clock is a miracle.

So the visit was plotted today. We travelled almost two hours to reach there. They said the hospice is the dead end; people go in, they don't go out. We took the lift, I felt desolation. We knocked on her door, I was surprised by what greeted us. She was there on her bed, emaciated, pallid, looking very fragile. She aged. We said hi, feigning the excitement in our voice. Though she could hear us, she did not respond much. She didn't talk. In the middle of our prayer, she let go some tears. The situation was unbearable.

I am certain that if there is any way she could buy time, she would give up everything, every single tangible and intangible, material and immaterial, possessions, gifts, or intelligence she has, for a little more extension. And God has greater plans. He has greater, unfathomable plans, where bidding for a moment may not be considerable. Or maybe it is. This is all a big blueprint, and our doings are the thumb mark of our identity.

There was not much to speak about. In the middle of the prayer, I cried. I cried when my other friend, while saying the third mystery of the Rosary, stood up and held her hand. I cried when I remembered the golden shoes she gave me. I did not have the opportunity to wear them in front of her. I'm wishing for that chance to come. When we bid goodbye, I told her we'll see her again. In God's most complex plans, showering miracles are His greatest slip-of-the-tongue. I'm praying to see her again, in her best physique. She used to wear the nicest clothes, I was told. I wish to see her in them. I know her for around two years, I'm hoping to get to know her more. God grants the sincerest wishes, in His own way. In His own time. In His own judgement. And when everything fails, the words of God will prevail. It will never fade. Even if our body does.

The Essence of Catechism

Fifth day of Sunday School. I was not able to attend last week's meeting because of my Melaka trip. I miss the kids.

Today's activity was about inspiring others by writing to them a prayer. After the discussion, we distributed some cards for the kids to write a prayer on. The prayers were meant for the Primary 3 kids who are about to embark on their First Holy Communion. The cards were folded in half; they were supposed to design it and write a prayer inside. On the outside of the card was the name of a Primary 3 kid. Each card bore one name. So we started distributing them.

We have about 25 kids in the class; the number of Primary 3 students is double (we were given names from three classes). We needed everything written on; we did not want to disappoint the Primary 3 kids who would receive blank cards. Initially, we gave the girls two each, the boys one. But those boys who finished early, we gave another one as well. I was distributing the second piece to the boys at the back of the class when I encountered this kid. I asked him, "How many have you written?". "Two", he said. I repeated, "Two?" He said, "Two". So I said ok. I moved on and talked to his classmate who was sitting beside him. I gave this classmate his second card when this particular boy dragged his chair closer to his classmate and said to me, "Actually, I only did one..."

Catechism is about knowing our faith. It is about realizing God's omnipotence, and His immense love. But catechism is also about transformation. The kid wanted to escape from doing the second card, but somehow, there was something in him that made him retract. I asked him how come he said two then, gave him another one, and thanked him. I thanked him for his honesty, and for proving what catechism is really about.

I attended the Teaching as a Profession Seminar yesterday at Orchard Hotel, a project by the Ministry of Education as a way of inviting prospects into the teaching life. They showed a short movie about what teachers teach. One teacher said, "I teach everything". My catechism class may not be as rigorous as the classroom setting, but the harvest is the same. Teaching is about transformation, whether it is carrying out their dreams, harnessing their gifts, or just plainly motivating them to be the best God's kids they could ever be.

I read some of the prayers, one was very artistic, some were funny. The one that inspired me the most was the one prayer written by the most talkative in the class. After a lot of persuading, I finally made him jot down something. I knew he could think up a thought, but whatever he penned down there was more than I had envisioned. He congratulated the kid for finally receiving the Holy Communion (he spelt it as Congratz!), asked God for guidance for the kid, and may He always bless him. We were touched. Here is a kid who could not stop talking, but when he is quiet and focused on whatever he is doing, he gives his best. He is capable of doing anything. They are capable of doing anything. Anyone who is God's precious child is able to do just about anything. ^^

Remember the Titans (aka clients)

I was doing some other transaction, not really focusing on the queue, when one client who was being served by my next-door neighbor asked me the most difficult question thrown at someone in the hospitality line, "Do you remember me?"

I was stunned. How could I? I serve quite a number of clients everyday, a lot of them are first-time encounters, most are regulars. I'm bad at names, at remembering faces. A blank look was all I could produce, while squeezing my brain cells to zoom in exactly when and where I saw him. My brain gave up. It couldn't give me any data. When he told me he complimented me the last time he was at the branch, because he was so impressed by my service, that's when it dawned on me. Recollection has found its way to me. I remembered him. And I felt guilty for not doing so to begin with.

Yeah, he did compliment me the last time he dropped by. I did not need it written down. I need not tell the world how one particular person sincerely acknowledged my service, plainly because he was pleased. It made my day. And I forgot about him, or how he looked like, at least. I feel guiltier now.

Malacca

Camera: check. Recharged battery and a spare: check. Coach booking: check. Guesthouse: check. Packing: done. I am so ready!!

Strait of Malacca. I have recently been reminded by a friend that this particular strait is historical, and another friend informed me it was used for trading and slavery during the olden times. Tomorrow, I will finally see this infamous body of water face to face. Maybe if I listen closely, I will be able to hear what it is able to articulate through the whispers of its waves. Its pleasurable and gruesome past. Its interesting and monotonous events. We'll see.

Not forgetting its churches. Its night market on Jonker Street. Its Portuguese influence. Tomorrow will be a meeting, Malacca and I. And I'll make sure every piece of it is preserved in photos. ^^

So Who Else is Getting Married?

When everyone is getting married and I'm not, should I panic?

As always, a big chunk of my off day is allotted to facebooking. I checked on posts, friends and whatever is getting them busy, and pictures. Wedding pictures. Everyone is getting married???

So my mom has reasons to be alarmed. I'm on my late twenties, unattached. My friends are of the same age, and are now embarking on a new phase of their lives. I see a lot of wedding photos, news on x number of months of pregnancy, and x number of months of anniversaries. What's new with me? Hmm... I learned biking this year. I'm planning to learn the guitar next. My turn to walk on the wedding aisle, you mean? No plans. Yet. Hahaha!

I am happy. I truly am. Of course I am happy. I am! I am? =p

Well, solitude is a choice. I'm hoping it is not eternal, though. ^^